


Don't Get Too Close, It's Dark Inside

by SLD24



Category: One Direction
Genre: But it's bitter sweet I promise, Cutting, Harry Styles - Freeform, Harry is a sweetie pie, I can't make any promises for a happy ending I'm sorry, It is now, Louis Tomlinson - Freeform, M/M, Runaway, Sorry again, Suicide, deaths of minor characters, don't be mad at me, i think that's a thing, louis is broken, possessed!louis, sorry for the third time, sorry in advance, trigger warning, you'll cry I hope
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-02
Updated: 2015-12-02
Packaged: 2018-05-04 14:09:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5336924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SLD24/pseuds/SLD24
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Are you dead?" Harry asked assuming he was talking to a ghost or possessed body. </p>
<p>"No," the boy whimpered and Harry realized that hit a nerve. "I wish I was."</p>
<p>"No you don't," Harry frowned. "You can't wish that, there's a lot to life that you don't even know and-"</p>
<p>"I kill anyone I touch. How much more to life can I look forward to?" </p>
<p>Or</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Louis kills anyone he touches. Even if he loves them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Get Too Close, It's Dark Inside

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry but the idea was there and I wrote it and it made me sad but I hope you still read it and like it :)

Harry couldn't stop running. He didn't want to stop running. With every stride came a new ounce of freedom. Each crunch of the leaves underneath of his feet meant he was further away from the prison of his home. No more fear, no more anxiety, no more pain. He had unattached the strings that restricted his every being inside of his home and ran. He ran far far away and not once did he look back. He had nothing to miss and had no where to be. It was him and the world. 

The sun was creeping down below the canopies of the stripped trees as Harry slowed his pace to a walk. There was no need to run because no one would look for him but he wanted to run. He wanted to feel free like a bird let out of it's cage. The crisp autumn weather aided none as the temperature dropped as the sun did. However, Harry enjoyed the view. He enjoyed the near naked trees and leaves of orange, yellow and red littering the ground. 

Soon the forest turned black but Harry felt no regret of entering. He wanted to be here. The trees wouldn't judge him or hurt him. He could cry if he wanted to. He could talk and be listened to. It was much more like home out in the dense woods. 

Harry continued his walk with hands in pockets and hood pulled over his messy, brown hair. A slight breeze blew here and there but other than that the area was still and silent. His arms clutched his jacket around him tighter as the temperature noticeable dropped. He didn't like it. He had no idea of the time and he had no idea where he was but something was off. He didn't want to turn around though. That would be accepting defeat. He had to do this for himself. He had to keep himself free. 

The air felt like it was getting thinner the further Harry walked. He could see his breath now and the moon was in full view above him. His eyes could barely adjust to the darkness which made his voyage into the unknown a blind one. Completely blind. Until he came through an opening in the tangled branches. 

A large house of rickety broken boards stood tall before him. Vines of great lengths crawling up the sides and wrapping around the corners. A window shattered on the porch with the broken shards lay a mess on the beams below. It appeared to be three stories tall with a single room towered to the right but still attached to the main structure. As if a princess were trapped inside. It reminded Harry of a castle but not for a royal family. A castle for a monster. A castle made of broken dreams and broken beams. A castle so unstructured it would collapse on its own rather than from an enemy attack. 

Harry slowly crept his way up the creaky stairs to the front door. 'Do Not Enter' etched into the wood with splinters poking from the thin carvings. Harry wished he would've wrote that on his home. It would've made him run away sooner rather than later. 

"Hello?!" Harry yelled and stepped back to survey the porch. A rocking chair was pushed off to side covered with ants. The windows were all boarded up except the shattered one. Harry knocked on the door but got no response as he suspected. The house was without a doubt abandoned which meant Harry had a place to stay. He attempted to open the front door but it was locked. The closest entrance was the shattered window. 

He punched at the glass with his book bag and tossed his bag in first. It landed with a thud and stirred up a cloud of dust. His hands carefully gripped the window sill and aided in helping him in. Only a few scratches were left on his hands but no serious injury. He slung the bag onto his back and looked around. The interior of the house in no way matched the exterior. The only similarity was the dust. He was currently standing in the foyer that immediately connected to a living space to his left. Two couches were pushed against the wall accompanied by a wall long bookshelf. To his right was a dining room with ten chairs all neatly tucked into their places. In front of him was the stair case. He decided he would go upstairs later. The living room was connected to the kitchen which took up the back of the house since it wrapped around to connect to the dining room. The fridge was empty but the sink wasn't. A cup laid on its side with water droplets on it and it was obvious the sink was damp. As if someone had recently been drinking water. 

Harry stepped back and looked around. The water should've evaporated if the house was as old as it looked. 

"Hello?!" Harry tried again and ventured to the bottom of the stair case. He noticed the basement door was in the kitchen but he didn't dare to go down. So he was back where he started. "Anyone!?"

Silence responded. The stairs creaked as Harry stealthy ascended up them. His hand sliding along the railing until he reached the top. Two long hallways extended to his left and right. All the doors were closed. 

His heart stopped when he heard a door at the end click close. Heat began to rush to his face and his heart was on the verge of exploding now. Fear building up inside of him but also curiosity. He had nothing to lose. If this was how he were to end then so be it. 

"Is someone up here?" He let his feet lead the way down the hallway. His pace being much quicker than expected as he had no desire to find out what was behind all the other doors. Only the door on the end. 

The door stood before Harry like a man with a knife. He knew it wasn't good. He knew very well that what ever was behind this door could very much kill him. He opened it anyway. 

"Please get out," a voice whimpered and Harry froze. It wasn't a deep voice. It was soft and scared. Harry wasn't even in the room yet but he looked around trying to find the source of the voice. 

"Is this your house?" Harry asked into the seemingly empty room. He disobeyed the voice and walked in. 

"Yes."

"I'm sorry I came in- it's just- I ran away and it got dark outside," Harry explained and his eyes landed on the only thing in the room. A small bed placed between two windows. Harry then realized this was the room that was towered off. The trapped princess room or so he called it. 

"It's dark in here, too," the voice responded and Harry paused when something moved under the covers. The voice didn't sound like a threat and Harry knew he wasn't dealing with a spirit because the lump under the blanket very much looked like a person curled into a ball. 

"Can you show me your face?" Harry tilted his head and reached forward for the blanket. 

"No don't!" The voice cried and flipped the opposite direction until he rolled off the bed. Harry widened his eyes and watched as a boy scurried out from the mess of blankets. "Don't touch me."

The boy was small. He was no taller than 5'7 and he had thin arms and legs. His cheekbones stuck out as if the skin on his face was paper thin. Dark circles encased bright blue eyes. Dark brown hair lied a mess on top of his head. He was painfully beautiful. 

"I'm sorry," Harry mumbled and remained on the opposite side of the bed. "I just didn't like talking to-"

"Get out," the boy whimpered. "Please just get out," he begged and Harry felt his heart get heavy with sympathy. The boy was obviously hurt. Obviously very bruised on the inside. 

"But you seem lonely in here."

"I like to be alone."

"Oh," Harry frowned and bit his lip as he watched the boy. He stood with his shoulders slouched and was biting his nails. "Can I just stay the night? Only one night?" Harry tried and the boy looked up. His finger still in his mouth and his eyes screamed for help. 

"No."

"Why not?" Harry huffed. "The house is huge and you won't even see me."

"Cause I could hurt you and I don't want to hurt you," he mumbled then went back to chewing on his nail again. Harry stayed quiet and watched as the boy swayed on his feet. 

"Why are you in here? Did you run away too?"

"No this is my house."

"It's not much of a house. It's quite old and there isn't any food in the fridge. How could you possibly live here?"

"It's my house and I like it here."

Harry sighed and looked around but there was nothing to look at except the boy. 

"Then why can't I share? If you're going to hurt me you might as well do it now so you can get it out of the way," Harry shrugged as he didn't really see the boy causing much damage. He looked more vulnerable then harmful. 

"I don't want to hurt you but I could and I don't want that."

"You don't make any sense," Harry crossed his arms and the boy slowly looked up. "You aren't going to hurt me but you could. That doesn't make much sense now does it?"

"It makes sense."

"It doesn't because if you could hurt me then that means you would have to want to hurt me which you don't."

"I don't want to hurt anyone. I never wanted to hurt anyone."

"So you've hurt people before?" Harry raised an eyebrow. The boy nodded and shoved his hands into his pockets. "How many then?" Harry questioned with a huff and the boy froze. His face falling and eyes looking down. He slowly pulled his hand out of his pocket and started to count on his fingers. Harry watched in silence. 

"Eight."

"Eight people?" Harry gulped and bit his lip. "What'd you do to them?"

The boy shoved his hands into his pockets again and mumbled something under his breath. 

"Hmm?" Harry hummed and leaned closer over the bed. "Speak up a bit," Harry whispered and the boy lifted his head. 

"I killed them."

Harry froze and felt his heart drop to his stomach. This boy killed eight people? The boy immediately ran out of the room and for some reason Harry followed. 

"No please don't!" The boy yelled and raced down the stairs. Harry reached his hand out but the boy dodged it. "Don't touch me you'll die," he whimpered and Harry stopped at the bottom of the stairs. The boy stopped running and looked up at Harry. A good amount of distance between the two. 

"What?" Harry frowned and tried to catch his breath. The hallway upstairs was much longer than he expected as was the staircase. 

"I kill anyone I touch. That's why you have to leave," the boy whimpered and tears streamed down his face. 

"That- that's impossible," Harry shook his head. 

"It's not," the boy frowned and wiped at his cheeks with the backs of his bony hands. 

"Are you dead?" Harry asked assuming he was talking to a ghost or possessed body. 

"No," the boy whimpered and Harry realized that hit a nerve. "I wish I was."

"No you don't," Harry frowned. "You can't wish that, there's a lot to life that you don't even know and-"

"I kill anyone I touch. How much more to life can I look forward to?" The boy cried and Harry stopped talking. He didn't want to ask the boy if he's tried though, tried killing himself. He didn't have it in him to ask. The boy was damaged beyond repair and Harry had no idea how to help. 

"What's your name?" Harry decided to start over. 

"Huh?" The boy choked out and looked up. His eyes filled with tears and confusion. 

"Your name. I'm Harry," he smiled softly and the boy started to chew on his lip. "You have a name right?"

"It's Louis," he whispered and wiped his nose on his sleeve. A baggy grey hoodie accompanied with black skinny jeans and socks. 

"I like that name," Harry said softly and Louis tilted his head. 

"What are you doing?" Louis asked and started to bite his finger nails again. Harry wanted to yank the boys hand away from his mouth but the rule seemed to be not to touch. 

"Being friendly," Harry simply answered and set his bag on the ground then sat down on the steps. "I have some food are you hungry?" Harry asked and unzipped his bag pulling out a bag of chips. 

"No I'm trying something out," Louis said shyly and sat down on the floor across from Harry. 

"Which is what?" Harry asked and popped open the bag of chips. Most of the chips were broken but he picked up a few and stuffed them into his mouth. 

"Not eating."

"Why? That's not good for you," Harry frowned and held the bag of chips out to Louis. "Come on, they're salt and vinegar."

"I don't want any," he shook his head and Harry pouted. 

"Please," Harry frowned and wiggled the bag. The boy eyed the bag before slowly extending his hand and reaching into it. He pulled out some chips and slowly stuck them into his mouth. "See it taste good, yeah?"

Louis nodded and Harry let him hold the bag. Harry wasn't that hungry anyway and he didn't want to eat all the food he brought now. If he was going to stay here he was going to need to figure out a way to get more. 

Louis only ate a few more chips before handing the bag back. Harry was careful not to brush their fingers together even though he still couldn't fathom that this boy had killed so many people. 

They sat in silence for a while because Harry wanted Louis to start a conversation but it didn't happen. All he did was chew on his finger nails. 

"You aren't going to have any fingernails left if you keep chewing," Harry chuckled trying to bring some light into the situation. 

"Sorry," Louis dropped his hands into his lap and took a deep breath. "Why-" Louis whispered softly as if ready to ask Harry a question but then he cut himself off. 

"Why what? You can ask me anything," Harry reassured him and rolled the chip bag up so they wouldn't get stale. 

"Why did you runaway?" 

Harry tensed up and was hit with a wave of emotion. He had almost forgotten that he had ran away. He was so enveloped in this human being that was Louis. His freedom didn't seem to matter as much as making the lost soul in front of him happy. 

"I-I didn't like my home. It wasn't healthy for me," Harry frowned as he's never talked about it. The only person who knew Harry better than he knew himself was his diary. But his diary was gone, he burned it so no one could find it. He didn't want anyone else knowing what he had going on inside his head. 

"How come? Homes are supposed to be healthy," Louis mumbled and Harry found it ironic that Louis would say such a thing. 

"I don't- I don't really want to talk about it if that's okay?"

"It's okay," Louis nodded. "But I-I'm very good at just listening if you ever need to talk."

Harry felt his heart do a weird thing. Like a flutter. It was nice. He felt like someone-Louis-was hugging his heart. 

"Maybe," Harry sighed and stood up. Louis seemed to be opening up very very slowly. Harry had a feeling he didn't want to open up but he couldn't help himself. "Can you show me around?" Harry asked and adjusted his bag on his back. Louis looked up with big blue eyes and bit the inside of his cheek. "If you want," Harry tacked on. 

"I-okay," he agreed half-heartedly and stood up slowly. "Um- this is the foyer," he mumbled. Harry just wanted to make the boy feel comfortable. If he could get Louis to talk more than maybe he'd open up more. Harry hadn't had a friend in years and he would bet Louis hadn't either. 

Louis lead Harry all around the house which was empty of any decor. It was all simple furniture. No pictures. No lamps. No nothing. It was stripped of anything that made a home a home. 

"How long have you lived here?" Harry asked as they made their way back to bottom of the stair case. Louis didn't show Harry the basement but Harry didn't bother to ask. 

"My whole life," Louis mumbled and curled his fingers clearly having the urge to chew on his nails again. 

"You were born here?"

"Yes."

Harry nodded and let his eyes gaze around some more. He hadn't picked up on it while they were touring but standing still he noticed that there were pin holes in the walls. As if decorations or frames were actually once hung. 

"Did you take a picture down from the wall here?" Harry asked motioning to the bare wall. Louis froze and his finger was brought to his lips again. 

"I don't remember," he mumbled and kept his eyes down not even looking at the wall Harry had motioned to. Harry had a feeling Louis did remember though. 

"That's okay," Harry sighed and rubbed his eyes. Sleep was catching up to him. Louis said he could sleep on the couch down here despite all the rooms available upstairs. Harry only got glimpses into them but they all had beds. "Do you know the time?" Harry yawned as he didn't have a watch nor a phone to use. 

"No," Louis mumbled. "Time doesn't really matter," he said softly under his breath and Harry frowned. Every once in a whole Louis would say something like that. Something dark and depressed that made Harry's heart rip open more. 

"Yeah I guess you're right," Harry shrugged. "But I think I'm going to go to bed if that's okay?" 

"It's okay."

Harry took a deep breath and nodded. He adjusted his bag on his shoulders and said good night to Louis before walking to the couch. Louis disappeared upstairs. 

Harry set his shoes down and tried to get comfy on the couch. He was too tall for it so he had to bend his legs. The cushions also had no give so he might as well have lied on the floor. 

"Do you want a blanket?" Harry jolted slightly as he didn't even hear Louis walk back downstairs. The boy was holding a red knitted throw. The one from the room upstairs where he found Louis. He assumed that was Louis' room. It was hard to tell due to the lack of personalization. 

"Sure," Harry held his hand out and Louis gently set the blanket in his hand. Louis' hands were shaking and most of his fingernails were bitten to the point that they were bleeding. "Thank you," Harry forced a smile hoping Louis would maybe smile back.

Louis simply nodded though. He turned around and Harry watched as the boy nearly sprinted upstairs. Harry let out a heavy sigh and lied down placing the blanket over himself. He couldn't sleep so he just picked at a loose string on the edge of the blanket. It was bright red and seemed to be hand sewn. Maybe Louis made it. Harry rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling. He wanted to leave. He wanted to find somewhere where he himself could be happy. Yet, he wanted to make Louis happy. If he could make Louis happy then that would make him happy. 

He closed his eyes in attempts to sleep but it failed. The house was too quiet and his thoughts were too loud. He wondered what Louis was doing. What he was thinking. How long has he been alone? Who did he kill? How did he kill them? Was he next? Was this an act? Harry sat up and pushed his hair off of his forehead. The blanket fell to the floor and Harry's eyes landed on a small tag. 

'To my loubear: forever is the darkness in your eyes but forever is the love I have for you."

Harry frowned and felt a twist of guilt in his stomach. The tag had a small bear on it. As if the blanket was made for a younger Louis. Harry stood up and neatly folded the blanket. He felt uncomfortable sleeping with it. It was meant for Louis not him. 

Harry decided to return the blanket. He had a feeling Louis was awake due to the fact it hadn't been dark for long. And the dark bags under Louis' eyes seemed permanent. The stairs seemed to creek even louder in the middle of the night as did the floorboards of the hallways. All the doors were shut even Louis'. 

"Louis?" Harry knocked softly and held the blanket in one arm against his body. Maybe the boy was sleeping. He gently pushed open the door and peaked in. The moonlight hit Louis' bed like a spotlight but it was empty. Harry looked around before walking in and setting the blanket on the bed neatly. 

The house was huge and Harry didn't want to snoop. Well he wanted to but he knew that would make Louis uncomfortable. So he left the room. The hallway stretched on and Harry noticed a door was slightly cracked open. 

"Louis?" He tried again but got no response. His eyes landed on the floor leading to the door and his stomach turned. Blood. Blood was smeared on the floor going from the room, down the hall to the stairs, down the stairs, through the dining room, and to the basement steps. Harry followed the trail but stopped at the top of the basement steps. It had to be Louis. 

"Louis?" He yelled down the stairs and his voice echoed. The stairs were concrete which meant the basement was clearly never used for living. Merely storage he assumed. 

"Don't come down here!" Louis yelled back. "Don't! Please don't!" He begged and Harry already had one foot on the top stair. He heard rustling around before Louis appeared at the bottom of the steps looking extremely paranoid. His eyes wide and clothes stained in blood. "Go back upstairs," he frowned and Harry was frozen. He couldn't move. He couldn't. "Please!" Louis cried and Harry realized the blood wasn't stained on Louis' jacket from the front. It was seeping through from the inside. 

"What are you doing?" Harry breathed and his hand gripped the railing as he wanted to throw up. 

"Go away Harry please!" Louis sobbed and Harry stepped back slowly. 

"Did you kill someone?" Harry choked out and Louis whimpered. He literally whimpered like a kicked puppy. 

"I tried."

"You said you don't do it on purpose."

"I don't kill other people on purpose," Louis breathed out and his breathing was heavy. His blood red hands visibly shaking. Harry knew it. He knew Louis would try. But Louis looked fine. He didn't look anywhere near unconscious yet he had blood basically pouring out of him. 

"Why- you can't die..." Harry whispered out loud as if Louis touching people wasn't crazy enough now the boy can't die. 

"I can kill everyone but myself," Louis forced out. Harry stared in fear as it made sense now. The starving thing that Louis was trying out must have been to try and starve himself to death. And now Louis obviously was trying to make himself bleed to death. 

"You- you- I- " Harry couldn't form a sentence before he stumbled back up the stairs into the kitchen. He leaned over the sink and vomited up the little food he had eaten. He needed to leave. This wasn't okay. This wasn't healthy. 

Harry wiped his mouth and turned the water on but what came out wasn't clear. It was murky brown. Harry gagged and rushed to the living room to grab his bag. 

"You're leaving?" Louis was on the front porch as Harry stepped out the door. 

"You- this- you want me gone so you don't kill me," Harry breathed out and he watched Louis' shoulders slump. He was still covered in blood but his hands were clean now. 

"But you said- I thought you were going to try to be my friend," Louis frowned and Harry felt a whirlwind of emotions twisting inside of him. Guilt. Fear. Sympathy. Panic. 

"I can't- you can't do that then. You can't mutilate yourself anymore," Harry motioned to Louis' red stained attire. He didn't even want to see what he looked like underneath the clothes. He imagined it to be deep slashes covering the boy from shoulders to feet. 

"It helps," Louis frowned. 

"No. No it doesn't," Harry shook his head. "I get that you're in pain because of what you did but you can't- you can't- damage yourself like that."

"It goes away," Louis frowned. "I don't bleed for very long."

Harry held his hand on his head and shook it. Louis was inhuman. He had to be. He was possessed or cursed or something. 

"I'll stay if you talk," Harry sighed. "If you tell me everything I'll stay and help you."

Louis shifted on his feet and the two met eyes. Louis' were dull and damaged. Harry's were wide and scared. 

"Okay."

Harry and Louis walked back inside to the living room. They sat on opposite ends of the couch. Louis leaned forward with his elbows on knees and Harry sat with his back against the arm rest so he could listen and watch Louis. 

*flashback*

"Louis, darling, are you all ready?" Johanna, his mother called up the stairs. Louis slugged out of his room clad in all black from head to toe. He was only about 8 years old. Very quiet and very reserved. 

"Where are you going, Lou?" Lottie, his sister poked her head out of her bedroom door. He had 6 younger siblings all a year apart except the twins, Daisy and Phoebe, who were of course the same age. Then Ernest and Doris were born a few months ago. 

"Mummy says I have to see someone," he mumbled and Lottie huffed. She was 7. 

"Well we're all having fun in here," she smiled. "We're doing make-up. Mummy let us have hers," she said and grabbed his arm pulling him inside. He winced and yanked his hand away. 

Phoebe and Daisy were 5 and sitting on Lottie's bed while Fizzy, 6 at the time, was messing around with red lipstick at the mirror. Ernest and Doris were with his father downstairs.

"I have to go see the person. Mummy will get mad if I'm not down there," Louis sighed and stepped back. "I'll come play later," he mumbled and quickly ran out of the room. Lottie sighed but didn't bother to chase her older brother. He was weird anyway. 

"I'm ready mummy," he mumbled as he walked downstairs. She was waiting at the bottom of the stairs. 

"He's in the kitchen, come on now," she ushered her son into the kitchen. A man sat in the kitchen chair dressed in a suit and he looked quite intimidating. He was older than Louis's father with dark black hair and a scrubbly haired face. His eyes were also piercing white-blue which freaked Louis out. "This is Mr. Daray, he's here to help you," Johanna forced a smile and pulled out a chair for Louis to sit in. He sat down and started to nibble on his finger nails. 

"If you'd be as kind as to leave the room, please," Mr. Daray peered up at Johanna who seemed startled by the request. Her son is only 8 and she wasn't sure she felt comfortable leaving him alone with a medium. 

"Of course," she obliged and nervously left the kitchen. 

"Do you mind if I see what you do?" He asked Louis and reached into his coat pocket. Louis watched with nervous eyes as Mr. Daray pulled a small living mouse out of his pocket. 

Louis shook his head and frowned. "I don't want to."

"Do it so I can figure out what you are," he demanded and held the small, delicate white mouse closer to Louis. 

"He's so small," Louis frowned and felt tears in his eyes. "Let him go," Louis sniffled and his lip quivered.

"Kill it."

"I don't want to," Louis whimpered. Mr. Daray grabbed Louis' wrist and pressed the boy's hand on top of the mouse. Tears trickled down Louis' face and he closed his eyes. 

"Interesting," the man whispered and Louis yanked his hand away. He sat on his hands and slowly opened his eyes seeing the small mouse dead on it's side. The man tucked the mouse into his jacket pocket and nodded. "Your power will intensify to humans sooner than later," he said casually and Louis frowned. He went to speak because he didn't understand but then his mother rushed in. 

"Excuse me?" She frowned. "What does that mean? My boy doesn't have powers, he doesn't kill animals on purpose," she snapped and yanked Louis to his feet shoving him behind her. 

"When did you move into this house?" The man asked and leaned back in the chair. 

"8 years ago when Louis was born," she answered and Louis held her hand from behind. 

The man nodded as if to inform Johanna of something. "And that's when your son became death," he said effortlessly. 

"My son is not death! You get out right now!" She raised her voice and Mr. Daray stood up slowly. 

"I'm only telling the truth," he held his hands up in defense and started to leave but continued to talk. "The house possessed some sort of spirit that has now engulfed your son and the only way to protect the rest of your family and any living thing is to kill your son."

"Get out!" She screamed and Louis let go of his mother's hand. He sprinted upstairs and into his room. The front door slammed and Louis watched out of his window as the man carelessly lit a cigarette then got into his car to leave. Louis sniffled and stepped back rubbing his eyes. He walked over to his bed and hid under the covers. Tears dripping down his sunken in cheeks because he didn't know what was going on. The man wanted Louis dead. 

"Louis can you come play now?" Lottie knocked on the door and Louis frowned. 

"I don't want to play anymore," he mumbled and curled into a tighter ball. 

"You never play with us," she pushed the door open and Louis felt a cool breeze hit him as she ripped the blanket off. "Please?" She forced a smile and took Louis' hand. 

"Okay," he sniffled and slid out of bed shuffling into Lottie's room with his siblings. He sat in the corner biting his fingernails most of the time as the girls played dress up. Lottie painted his fingernails blue for him but he ended up picking the dry polish off. 

They didn't eat dinner as a family that night. Louis stayed with his sister's most of the day but didn't participate in any of their games. He heard his mother on the phone a few times and his father would talk here and there but Louis couldn't make it out. 

"Goodnight Oli, I'm sorry," Louis whispered to the framed picture of the family's dog. "I didn't mean it," Louis sighed and set the picture frame on his nightstand table. He rolled over and curled up into a ball feeling a thousand pound weight in his stomach. His fingers hurt from the day's chewing and his eyes were dry from the constant crying. 

"I read that it feeds off of suffering," Johanna spoke to her husband, Andrew. 

"That's nonsense. You heard what the medium said," he snapped and Louis wished he couldn't hear his parents talking. 

"I heard what he said. Our son is possessed apparently and whatever is inside of him is living off of our sons suffering," she snapped. 

"He's going to hurt our family, Johanna. They're all young, they won't remember him when they're older."

"You're absolutely insane! How are you even considering killing your first-born son!?"

"You rather he live and everyone else die!? He is hardly a son anyway!" He yelled and Louis tightened into a ball under his sheets. His body trembling. He held his hands over his ears and squeezed his eyes shut. Louis laid frozen in bed until the light flicked on. His eyes shot open and he was ripped out of bed by his legs. 

"Andrew stop it!" Johanna yelled as Louis was thrown against the dresser. His little body crashing into the wood then falling to the ground. He screamed and shrunk into a ball of pain as a foot nailed him in the ribs. "Stop it!" Johanna screamed and grabbed her husbands arm yanking him back. Louis' body limp on the ground. His abdomen ripping with pain and his skull ready to explode. Everything hurt. Everything in his life hurt. 

The next few weeks consisted of Louis resting in bed. His mother and sisters only ever tended and talked to him. Never his father. He didn't even know if his father was still in the house. He healed much quicker than Johanna expected but he healed. Physically at least.

"Look who I have," Lottie came waddling in one morning struggling to hold Doris on her hip. Louis liked his siblings. They were nice to him. 

"And baby number two!" Fizzy giggled struggling even more to hold Ernest. "Mummy is in the shower and she said for us to watch them but they wanted to see their oldest brother."

The two sisters sat the babies on the bed and Louis' lip pulled up in a small smile. 

"Can I hold them?" Louis asked and sat up against the headboard. Lottie huffed and picked up Doris handing her to Louis. "She's very cute," Louis nodded and watched his baby sister's eyes. 

"Ernest is cuter," Fizzy teased and moved her baby brother closer to Louis. 

"They're twins so they're both cute," Louis mumbled and wiggled his finger so Ernest would hold onto it. 

Lottie and Fizzy sat beside their brother and shared a few laughs as the babies hiccuped and mumbled. Louis liked it. He was content in this moment. 

"Girls?" Johanna walked into Louis' room and let out a sigh of relief. "Thank god," she smiled and Louis grinned. 

"I'm holding them, mummy, look," he beamed and glanced down at Doris. 

"I can see- " Johanna started then froze when she noticed Doris wasn't moving. "Is she sleeping?" She frowned. 

Louis looked down again and gulped. She was awake two seconds ago. His heart ripped open as Ernest fell over. He just fell over. Mid-breathing and his baby brother falls over. His mother picked up Ernest and her eyes widened. 

"No," she choked out and held her ear to the baby's chest. "No, no, no," she panicked and reached for Doris but stopped. 

"I-I didn't do it mummy," Louis whimpered with tears rolling down his cheeks. "I didn't mean it!" He sobbed and kissed Doris' forehead before setting the baby down. 

"Don't touch him girls," Johanna choked out and watched her son flee the room. 

Louis stumbled through the hall and down the steps sobbing uncontrollably. His head spinning and hands shaking. He killed his baby brother and sister. He killed them. He swung open the front door and smacked into his father. He fell back and whimpered. His eyes grew wide as his father glared down at him. 

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" He growled and Louis flinched as his father picked him up. Kill me please Louis begged inside of his head. 

Louis wiggled his feet as his father carried him out to the car. Clearly having some sort of motive in mind already. However, his father only made it half way to the car before collapsing. 

"Louis what's wrong?" Daisy ran down the porch followed by Phoebe. Both of their eyes landing on their dead father. Daisy grabbed Louis' hand and he yanked it away. 

"I didn't mean it," Louis mumbled and stared with wide eyes at his sisters. Phoebe brushed past Louis nudging his shoulder as she kneeled down before her father. 

"You-you killed him?" She whimpered and Louis shook his head. 

"No I- I didn't mean to," Louis stuttered and stepped back. His heart pounding with panic and every inch of his skin was crawling. 

He sprinted back inside and to the basement. It was dark and cold and empty which was okay. He picked the area under the stairs to sit in. The walls weren't finished so he could see the wooden beams, same went for the ceiling. The floor was cold concrete and boxes were scattered among the room in no particular way. He cried all day and no one ever came down to look for him. He stayed under the stairs for 5 days before the basement door creaked open. Louis was weak, he hadn't eaten or slept very much at all. 

"Lou?" His mother frowned and he could hear her voice shake. Louis scrunched further back under the stairs and closed his eyes, hiding his face in his knees. He didn't want to be found. She was going to kill him or something. He killed everyone else. Her light foot steps echoed softly until they stopped. He heard her take in a shaky breath and sigh before walking back upstairs. 

Louis let out the breath he was holding in and stood up. He heard the door close and he knew now that his mother thought he ran away. He wanted to run away but he had no where to go and too many people to hurt. 

The days dragged on and Louis remained under the stairs. His arms and legs the size of toothpicks and his ribs poking out. He wasn't even hungry. He felt normal. He lost count of the days but he knew it was long. 

One day Louis decided to return upstairs. Everyone was dead. He touched them all. Lottie and Fizzy. Doris and Ernest. His father. Phoebe and Daisy. His mother...he didn't touch her. Louis crawled up the stairs and slowly pushed the door open. The house was quiet and cold. It was also empty besides all the furniture. Everything stripped away. Louis made his way into the living room and his eyes landed on a red blanket. 

"To my loubear: forever is the darkness in your eyes but forever is the love I have for you'

Louis sniffled and picked up the blanket to wrap around himself. It fit around him loosely and he walked with it upstairs. All the rooms were empty. Louis checked. The beds and cribs remained but there were no more dolls are dresses or flowers. His room no longer had books or toy trains. Everything gone. 

"Louis?" A voice rang out and Louis lifted his head to see his mother at the top of the stairs. Except she looked nothing like his mom. She was thin and broken. Her skin was pale and her hair was a mess. Nothing about her said mom. 

Louis stayed quiet as the stranger slowly approached him but didn't get too close. A permanent frown etched onto her face accompanied by dark bags under her eyes and wrinkles on her skin. 

"I made you that blanket," she croaked and Louis nodded. He wanted to just hug her. He needed to feel the warm embrace of someone's hug. Especially his mother's. 

"I like it," he whispered and tugged it around him tighter. She smiled softly then frowned. 

"Everyone's gone Lou," she mumbled and took a deep breath. Her eyes filling with tears. 

"Where's everything?" He asked as he didn't want to here about everyone. He didn't want to relive it. 

"It's all burned. I couldn't live with it all," his mother whimpered. "I can't live anymore, loubear."

Louis' heart dropped and he felt tears on his cheeks. He just got her back. He couldn't lose her. 

"Don't leave me, mummy," he sniffled and widened his eyes as his mother leaned forward engulfing him into a hug. 

"I love you so much Louis," she whispered and held him tight against her chest. He whimpered and wrapped his frail arms around his mother closing his eyes. The warmth radiating from her onto him. He wanted to hold her forever. 

"I love you too mummy," he whispered and she kissed all over his face. She kneeled down and Louis clung to her tighter as she weakened. "Please don't go," he cried and tried to hold her up as she started to slump. The life slowly draining from her eyes. 

"Be a good boy," she whispered. "Don't let it make you suffer," she breathed out before collapsing. Louis sobbed and gently laid his mother down on the floor. He laid down with her and wrapped her arms around him. His head buried against her chest as he cried. He cried for days. He cried for months. He cried everyday. 

This was his life. No, this was his death. He was told he was death and while other people lived he continued to die.

*end flashback*

Harry stared at Louis as Louis stared at nothing. Silence fell over them and Harry had nothing to say. No response. No questions. He just wanted to hug Louis. He wanted to wipe away the tears. Wipe away the pain. Wipe away his past. He couldn't even say he was sorry because it wouldn't help. Words couldn't help Louis. 

"Louis that's-"

"I'm going upstairs," Louis choked out and stood up quickly with shaking hands. Harry didn't mean to make the boy relive everything. He just wanted to know. He wasn't aware of its extent and he regretted asking. 

"Can't you stay?" Harry stood up slowly and Louis paused. His back turned to Harry and his head hung low. "We can talk about something else," Harry suggested and chewed on his lip. 

"I don't have anything more to talk about."

"Do you have a favorite color?" Harry continued anyway and he watched Louis shift on his feet. 

"Red," he mumbled.

"I like blue," Harry said softly. "It reminds me of the ocean and sky. Like any thing is possible."

"Roses are red," Louis whispered. "There used to be a rose garden out front," he trailed off. 

"Roses are very pretty," Harry agreed and cautiously walked over to stand in front of Louis. "Maybe tomorrow we could plant some?"

"We don't have seeds."

"I-I could- I could run into town. It's only a hour away on foot," Harry breathed out. 

"You won't come back."

"Yes I will, I have no where else to be."

Louis looked up and watched as Harry held his pinky up. 

"I can't-"

"Just hold up your pinky and curl it when I curl mine. We'll pretend," Harry cooed and Louis slowly raised his pinky in the air. The two boys curled their pinkies in unison around the air in a pinky promise. 

Harry left the next morning deciding to pick up rose seeds, some food and a small pack of water bottles. He would need to make frequent food runs and figure out a better method of carrying more supplies back through the woods to the house. He had plenty of money to last him a few months and when he ran out he could just start stealing. It wasn't a heavily secured market anyway. 

When Harry returned his eyes widened as Louis was crouched down in the garden. His hands dirty and weeds were thrown off into a small pile on the side. 

"Hey," Harry gently spoke up. Louis snapped his head up and let go of the weed in his hand. "You got a head start," Harry smiled and set his heavy back pack down. He would need to purchase a wagon of some sorts on his next trip so he could carry more. 

"Yeah," Louis nodded and pulled on the weed before it snapped out of the ground. He tossed it aside and moved onto the next one. 

"Do you want me to clear all these leaves out?" Harry asked as there were leaves all in the garden. It was a small garden but Harry could tell Louis was excited even if he didn't show it. 

"Yes."

"Alright," Harry nodded then pushed his sleeves up and began to pick up the crunched dead leaves. "I had to buy special winter roses if that's okay?" Harry spoke up after a few minutes of silence. 

"Are they red?"

"Um- well the red ones flourish more in the spring and summer so I bought Griffith Bucks. The lady said they grow in the winter better."

Louis nodded and continued to weed. Harry watched and bit his lip. 

"But I did buy a few red roses to plant inside," he added and Louis' head popped up at him. "I even bought pots for them."

"We can set them by the window," Louis said softly and sat back on his knees brushing his hands on his pants. "I don't want them to get too cold."

"We could plant them all inside if you'd like? I know you've spent time out here but they may not grow as nicely out in the cold," Harry tried to sound as nice as possible. He didn't know how long Louis had been working out here. 

"Could we move them outside for the spring then?" Louis asked nervously and went to bite his nails but stopped himself because they were covered in dirt. 

"Of course," Harry smiled and stepped out of the garden. 

Louis and Harry walked inside and picked out the window in the living room to make into their little indoor garden. The wood panels were easy to remove and it the now open window brightened up the living room a bit more. It was a bay window with a ledge so it had ample space for a few flower pots. Harry had to dig up soil from outside but Louis helped him. 

"The sun hits the front of the house best," Louis nodded and tucked his hands into his pockets as Harry ripped open the seed bag. 

"We'll just need to keep them out front here then," Harry said and handed the bag to Louis. 

"I can't touch them," he let his head fall and Harry frowned. Right. Flowers are living things. Harry poked the seeds into each pot and stepped back. They had four pots. Two were red roses and two were of the Griffith Bucks. 

"When do we water them?" Louis asked and swayed on his feet. Harry could tell Louis liked this. He didn't know if Louis always liked gardening or if it was the fact that Louis could bring something to life rather than destroy it. 

"Probably three times a week," Harry shrugged as he vaguely remembered what the lady told him. "And in the mornings," he nodded. "We could water them every Monday, Wednesday and Friday."

"What's today?" Louis asked and kept his eyes on the pots. Harry frowned and rubbed the back of his neck. He ran away yesterday and he thought it was Thursday so that would make today Friday. 

"I think it's Friday," Harry answered. "We can make a calendar and assign dates for watering," he suggested and Louis nodded. 

They sat on the living room couch and Harry used one of the pieces of notebook paper from his journal. He luckily had a pencil at the bottom of his bag. 

He sketched out a calendar and assigned each square a number. He believed today was October 30th. The rest of the calendar was for November. 

"What is that?" Louis motioned to the little pumpkin Harry drew on October 31st.

"A pumpkin for Halloween," Harry said and sat the pencil down watching as Louis narrowed his eyebrows. 

"What is that?" Harry tilted his head and frowned. 

"It's a holiday that um- well it- people dress up and carve pumpkins," Harry nodded. 

"Why?" Louis asked and he traced his finger around the small pumpkin. 

"Well it's to- it's basically- it's superstitious but it's to um- to ward of ghosts," Harry gulped and watched Louis tense up. 

"It can help me?" 

Harry frowned as he expected that. He expected Louis to want help. He didn't exactly know how the spirit inside of Louis worked but he knew there was one there. 

"I don't- I've- it's just a superstition," Harry frowned and Louis sighed heavily. 

"I don't know what that means either," he mumbled and Harry realized Louis didn't get much of an education. He had to have been home schooled with his sisters but only for so long. He was actually surprised Louis could talk so fluently. Even if he was only eight when he stopped learning he still had a lot to learn and he learned most of it. He assumed Louis was 16 now or somewhere around there. 

"It's basically just a belief based on old folk stories and such. They aren't always real," Harry explained and Louis nodded. 

"You believe it though. You participate in it," Louis pointed to the pumpkin. Harry tensed up and shrugged. 

"No one really- it's just to get candy and dress up," Harry sighed as he didn't mean to get Louis' hopes up. 

"People don't believe in ghosts?" Louis frowned and started to bite his nails again. 

"Some people do," Harry nodded and glanced at Louis. His cheek bones sticking out and teeth nibbling at the short stub of a nail. 

"Are you going to do it tomorrow?"

"Do what?"

"Scare the ghost away tomorrow?"

"No because I could- I don't want to accidentally hurt you," Harry breathed out and kept his eyes on Louis. Louis remained quiet and his eyes flicked over as Harry picked up the pencil and erased the pumpkin. "There," he smiled softly and looked back up at Louis. 

"Today is Friday," Louis mumbled and Harry nodded. "I'll water the roses on Friday's," he picked up the pencil and held it with his fist as he drew out a shaky 'L' on the days date. He continued this for all the other Fridays in the month of November as well. 

"I'll do Monday's," Harry offered and Louis dropped the pencil in his hand so Harry could write an 'H' on all the Mondays. "What about Wednesdays?"

"We can both do it," Louis nodded and leaned forward to watch Harry write 'HL' on all the Wednesdays. Harry sat the pencil down and Louis picked it up. Harry watched as Louis tried to hold the pencil the way Harry had held it. 

"Put your pointer finger there," Harry pointed and got a little to close to Louis' finger causing Louis to recoil and drop the pencil. "Sorry," Harry frowned and set his hand in his lap. 

Louis remained quiet and stood up taking the small calendar with him. "I'm going to put it on the front door so we see it everyday," Louis nodded. 

"Do you have tape?" Harry asked and stood up following behind Louis. 

"No," Louis frowned. 

"There's none in the rooms upstairs?" Harry asked cautiously as he knew those were his family's rooms. He wasn't sure if Louis ever went in there. 

"I don't know," Louis frowned and held the calendar against the front door. 

"Could I go check?" Harry asked and bit his lip. Louis looked down then over his shoulder. 

"Lottie's room- the room across from mine has a desk," he mumbled and his voice cracked. "She liked to hang things on her wall," he nodded. Harry stepped back and took that as an okay to go check. He felt nauseous as he walked upstairs. The house was dead. Everything was dead and Harry knew he was the closest one to being alive. He was the only living thing. Their spirits probably loomed around. Louis was alive but Louis was also dead. 

He gently stepped into the room and felt a rush of cold air. The bed was in the corner and the desk was as the end of it. Nothing else. Just furniture. No one could ever establish this was once a girls room. He opened a few desk drawers but they were all empty. Only dust and a few cob webs. No tape. 

"Did you find any tape?" Louis asked from the door and his head was hung low. 

"Oh um- no, the drawers were all empty," Harry gently closed the last drawer he checked. "I might have some gum in my bag that we could chew and stick to the door," he suggested but Louis didn't seem to be listening. 

Louis sulked into the room with his head down. Harry remained still at the desk watching Louis. It was clear Louis hadn't ever walked into this room since he lost his sister. Lost his family. 

"She liked playing with make-up," he nodded and glanced at the mirror sat in the corner of the room. "She would sit right here," he whispered but he seemed to be talking to himself. He sat down in front of the mirror and gently touched the mirror. He didn't even seem to be looking at his reflection but through it. "Pink looked best on her," he whispered and turned his head. His eyes landing on something underneath the bed and Harry gulped but stayed still. Louis slowly crawled over and reached under the bed. Harry watched as the boy lifted up a small black tube of lipstick. 

"Her favorite color was red too," Louis smiled and uncapped the lipstick then capped it again. 

"Did she wear it a lot?" Harry asked softly trying not to interrupt too much but Louis seemed to want to talk. Even if he was only talking to himself. 

"No. Mummy only let her play with it sometimes," he said and gently sat the lipstick upright beside the mirror. "Sometimes she'd put it on me," he mumbled. 

"I bet you looked pretty," Harry forced a small chuckle trying to lighten the mood although he knew it was impossible. It didn't hurt to try though. 

"She told me so," Louis whispered and ran his hand over his lip. "Do you have any sisters?" Louis asked out of the blue and Harry gulped. 

"One," he said softly. "She's older than me though."

"Did she give you make-overs?"

"Yeah," Harry smiled half-heartedly and slowly walked over to sit down beside Louis facing the mirror. "She made me look like a clown though," he chuckled. "With rosy red cheeks and bright blue eye shadow."

"Blue eye shadow is not your color," Louis mumbled and peered at Harry out of the corner of his eye. Harry smiled at that and nodded. 

"I told her that," he said and glanced at Louis. "I think a nude color would look okay," he shrugged. 

"Light pink," Louis suggested. "It would match your lips and cheeks."

"Light pink would look good on you too," Harry added on. 

"I look good in everything," Louis said and Harry swore he felt his heart explode. Louis made a joke. A small joke about himself but it was a joke. A sarcastic little jab. 

"I can believe that," Harry grinned. Louis nodded and closed his eyes taking a deep breath. 

"What is your sisters name?" 

"Gemma," Harry answered as he liked the conversation. It was as if it was helping Louis to heal. 

"Do you like her?" Louis asked and picked at his finger nails. 

"I love her," Harry responded. "But she moved out so I didn't see her very much."

"Is that why you ran away?" 

"N-no," Harry frowned and looked ahead at himself in the mirror. His hair was a mess as usual and his skin was pale and dirty. The bags under his eyes didn't quite match Louis' but they were there. 

Louis stayed quiet and Harry knew Louis wanted an answer. Louis had opened up to Harry and it was Harry's turn to open up to Louis. 

"I-I- I ran away cause my father hated me," Harry mumbled. "He didn't like me, he didn't like my mom or my sister either but he didn't like me."

"Why?" Louis asked and glanced over at Harry with sympathetic eyes. Another emotion that Harry discovered Louis actually possessed. 

"Cause I'm gay," Harry huffed. "And my mother and sister were okay with it but my dad despised it," Harry shook his head. 

"What's gay?" 

Harry looked up at Louis and shook his head as he couldn't help but smile at the little question. "It means I like boys."

"Oh," Louis nodded and didn't ask any other questions. He probably didn't see it as a problem since he wasn't raised out in the real world. He wasn't exposed to the norms and the beliefs so he honestly probably couldn't care less. 

"Yeah, but he beat me and locked me in closets. He would call me names and my sister and mother couldn't do anything about it. So then my sister left and didn't really contact home anymore. Then my mom died." 

"She died?" Louis spoke up and his voice was heavy with shock. 

"Mhm," Harry nodded. "She had cancer."

"What's that?"

"A disease that usually kills people," Harry explained vaguely. 

"Not always?" Louis asked and Harry knew that Louis was trying to compare himself to the disease. 

"Not always but most of the time," Harry shrugged. 

"Did your dad have cancer?"

"No no, only some people get it," Harry explained and he understood now. He understood that talking helped. Just like Louis talked about Lottie seemed to heal, Harry talking about his family defiantly was aiding him. 

"Oh," Louis nodded and looked at Harry in the mirror. Harry could feel Louis' pain just by looking into his eyes. Every piece of the boy was shattered and the only progress Harry had made was collecting the pieces into a pile. 

"My father got worse after that," Harry continued and he didn't know if Louis wanted to listen anymore but he talked anyway. "I stopped going to school because the bruises got bad. And he started drinking so one day I just left. I figured there had to be something better out there."

"You found me," Louis frowned in disappointment. 

"I found a friend," Harry said immediately and turned his head to look at Louis. "I found someone who likes to listen and likes to garden and who likes to just be with me." Harry knew it had only been two days but Louis was different. This whole situation was different. And besides Harry was louis' first friend in years. His first human contact actually. 

Louis gazed at Harry with a blank expression. His eyes started to fill with tears and the corners of his lips tugged downwards. 

"Please don't cry," Harry frowned and felt guilty. He was just trying to make Louis feel better. Feel loved and cared about. 

"It's good tears," Louis sniffled and wiped his nose with his sleeve. Harry smiled softly and took a deep breath. Good tears. That meant Louis was happy. Or at least somewhere near happy. 

"Good," Harry smiled and wiped his eyes so he wouldn't start crying. He stood up and watched Louis follow. "We should water the roses now so we don't forget."

"It's my turn, not yours," Louis said and walked out of the room. Harry sighed in relief as that was another joke.

Harry felt like he had just accomplished setting one piece of shattered glass back into place in the broken being that was Louis Tomlinson. It was one piece but Harry knew the other pieces would soon follow. 

"How much water?" Louis asked and unscrewed the cap of the water bottle. 

"Not too much," Harry shrugged. "It's just a little baby seed so it doesn't need a lot."

Louis nodded and slowly poured a bit of water on it until Harry told him to stop. He repeated the action for the next three pots as well. 

Harry watched as Louis delicately watered each pot of soil. It brought a smile to his face as Louis seemed content. He seemed well and seemed to be enjoying the smallest thing. It had to be the fact that this was Louis' way of giving back to the world. Giving back life that he had taken away. 

"Are you hungry?" Louis asked and Harry raised an eyebrow as the question was a bit out of place. 

"A little," Harry shrugged. "I bought some food from the market," he said as he walked to his bag to pull out more chips and snack foods. 

"The stove doesn't work anymore," Louis huffed. "Nothing works anymore so you can't cook meals."

"That's fine," Harry shrugged and kept an eye on Louis as he looked upset. "You alright?"

Louis looked up then shook his head. Harry gulped and stood up as he hated this. Louis was just so happy. Or at least he thought he was happy. 

"What's wrong? We can talk about it, talking helps, yeah?"

"Nothing works anymore," Louis repeated and started to chew on his nails. "I killed everything, it's all my fault," he whispered to himself and took off in a sprint. Harry was right behind him as Louis made sharp turns trying to lose the curly haired boy. 

"Louis please stop," Harry begged. "You can't run from your problems!"

"You did!" Louis whimpered and stopped in his tracks. Harry nearly smacking into him but he was quick to halt. 

"I- yeah but- you- this-"

"This is my fault. This all is my fault! This is who I am and I can't run Harry. There's no where for me to run! I'm stuck inside of my on head so I'm allowed to run. I'm allowed to feel like I'm getting away when in reality I'm just getting dragged further down."

Harry frowned and watched as Louis went into a panic. His hands shaking and eyes filling with tears. He wanted to hug Louis. He wanted to squeeze him and tell him everything was alright and that he had a friend but he couldn't. He could only watch. He could only watch as the glass pieces shattered again but much smaller this time. 

"Louis please listen to-"

"Just leave me alone," Louis whimpered. "I don't- I want to be left alone." 

"You're going to hurt yourself," Harry choked out as he felt sick to his stomach thinking of Louis' condition the other day. The blood and the fear and it was all very real and all very terrifying. 

"I hurt myself everyday," Louis huffed. "Every time I look at you I hurt myself because one day I'm going to kill you."

"Don't say that," Harry snapped and took a deep breath. "We can stay friends. We don't need to touch or anything. We can just talk and water our roses."

"I don't want a friend anymore."

Harry gulped and felt his chest tighten up. He wanted to help Louis. He wanted to keep him company. To fix him. To heal him. To give him a real life of hugs and hair-behind-the-ear tucks and maybe even kissing. Kissing Louis would be nice. He was cute even if he was broken. 

"Please Louis don't just push me away. I'm here because I want to be your friend. I want to help you."

"No one can help me, Harry."

"I've already helped you though. I made you smile and- and you consider me your friend," Harry explained and Louis gave no response. Whether that be a good or bad thing Harry didn't know. "Please just let me stay."

Louis shifted on his feet and looked down. Tears dripping off his chin and onto the hardwood floor. 

"I'm not supposed to be feeding it..."

"What?" Harry frowned and took a deep breath as that was odd. Feeding what? 

"Suffering, he said it feeds off of suffering," Louis mumbled in a monotone voice then wiped his cheeks off. 

Harry recalled Louis' story and remembered the medium telling that to Louis. It feeds off of suffering. That meant it could be starved. It could be killed. The thing inside of Louis could be starved out if Harry could just make Louis happy. If he could stop the suffering. 

"Then you need to starve it. You need to- you need to not suffer and- you need to focus on what makes you happy. Louis, you could be free!" Harry went to touch Louis' shoulder but Louis ducked down. 

"I can't force myself to be happy."

"I know that but-" Harry paused as it hit him. Louis killed his whole family at the age of 8. 8 years old. Little Louis then sat alone in a house for 8 years wondering what he did wrong. Wondering why him? Blaming himself. He couldn't just turn on a switch and be happy. 

"You make me happy," Louis whispered and Harry's head snapped up. His eyes meeting Louis' and they looked much brighter. A bright blue rather than a dull gray. 

"Really?"

Louis nodded and played with his fingers. "I like having you around, it helps me forget and- and it makes me feel cared about," Louis admitted and Harry could hear the struggle in his voice. Like the thing inside of Louis was pulling on his voice box to shut him up but Louis said it anyway. 

"That's all I want to do," Harry whispered. "I want you to feel comfortable and to know that someone actual cares. Even if that someone is just me."

"Just you is enough," Louis whispered and he met Harry's gaze again. A small smile pulling on the corner of Louis' lip. Harry smiled and hoped Louis would follow but Louis' lips fell straight again. It was a start. He knew Louis could smile because he's seen it happen or at least almost happen.

Later that night Louis refused to leave the house with Harry to wash up. Harry knew the public pool by the market had a outdoor shower they could use. The pool would be closed and the fence wasn't tall so they could easily sneak in. 

"Please Louis it'll be good to wash up," Harry begged as he assumed Louis hadn't had a proper clean in years. 

"I don't want to go out there," Louis nibbled on his fingernail sitting on the chair by the roses. 

"We'll go late when no one is out," Harry explained but Louis shook his head. "Please? For me?" Harry sighed and Louis stopped biting his nail. 

"Do I smell?"

"A little," Harry shrugged but tried to answer in a light-hearted manor.

"Do you have soap?"

"Yes."

"Shampoo?"

"Just soap."

"Can you get shampoo?"

"If you come with me," Harry took a deep breath. He was getting somewhere. 

"I'm allergic to strawberries. No strawberry scents right?"

"None," Harry nodded and dug around in his bag. "I'll buy you whatever scent you want."

"Okay."

Harry was tempted to hold Louis' hand as they walked. Louis told Harry about the long driveway that lead to a main road then to town so they could avoid the woods. It was much faster and much safer. Although every time a car went by Louis would freeze. 

Every sound scared Louis and every light. It was heart wrenching as Louis stumbled along. His legs thin and knees wobbling. He kept his distance from Harry though, as usual. 

They reached the pool and Harry tossed his bag over the waist high fence. Louis could clear it right. Harry eased over it then turned to watch Louis. 

"Grab the top with your hands and pull yourself up and over," Harry instructed and he so desperately wanted to just pick Louis up. He probably weighed no more than a toothpick. "Come on you can do it," Harry gulped. Louis struggled and eventually flipped over the fence landing on his back. Harry winced and went to help him up but stopped when Louis winced away. Louis was always aware. Always aware of people. 

Louis stammered back up to his feet and looked around before his eyes landed on Harry. He looked extremely out of his element. 

"Come on Lou," Harry put on a smile hoping it would make Louis feel safer. Feel more comfortable. Louis walked up to Harry and they shuffled to the outdoor shower. "I'll go first okay? Unless you want, I'll stand watch," Harry suggested and Louis looked around again. 

"I'll go first," he nodded and Harry bit his lip. He opened the door for Louis and Louis stepped in. He assumed Louis knew how a shower worked. He didn't want to ask and embarrass Louis even though he had a feeling Louis wouldn't ask even if he was confused. 

"Do you want me to hold your clothes? You can toss them over the top," Harry spoke up softly as he still didn't hear the water turn on. It was pitch black and quiet so he could hear just about everything. Which didn't include the water running or Louis moving around. "Lou are you alright?" He asked and bit his lip looking at the closed door. No answer. "Lou?" He knocked softly. 

"What?" Louis mumbled and it was soft and scared. He didn't want to be here. God, Harry knew this was a bad idea. He was just trying to help and all he did was traumatize the poor boy. 

"Do you need help?" Harry offered and felt his insides twisting with guilt. 

"Which way makes the water warm?" Louis mumbled and Harry sighed. 

"Probably the right," Harry assumed as that's how his shower at home was. He didn't imagine a outdoor public pool shower got all that warm but it was better than being dressed in his own filth. 

Eventually, Harry heard movement and Louis' clothes appeared over the top of the door. Harry grabbed them and held them in his arms. He should probably buy Louis new clothes. He wasn't sure where Louis got these clothes considering he most likely out grew a lot of his other clothes. Maybe Louis snuck out one day or something and stole them. Or they were his parent's clothes. They were oversized so it was possible. 

"It's cold," Louis whimpered and Harry saw Louis' feet backed up into the corner of the shower. 

"Try turning it to the left," Harry tried and bit his lip looking around. His eyes widened when he saw a car pull into the pool parking lot. The headlights shined on Harry for a brief movement before the car turned off. It was a cop car. "Lou we need to go," Harry panicked and tried opening the shower door but it was locked from the inside. 

"I'm naked," Louis shivered. 

"Unlock the door," Harry gulped and stayed pressed against the door. He can't get caught. They'll take him back to his dad. They'll send Louis away to an orphanage then realize what he does then kill him. "Louis unlock the door!" He raised his voice and he really didn't want to. He didn't want to scare Louis. 

The lock clicked and Harry swung the door open. It was too dark to see much but he shut the water off. Louis was curled in the corner with his back to Harry. 

"Be quiet okay?" Harry whispered and closed the shower door and locked it. He prayed the officer wouldn't see their feet. Louis wouldn't be fast enough and Harry wouldn't be able to carry Louis without dying. 

Harry's heart pounded against his chest like a lion trying to get out of a cage. His eyes were frozen on Louis' back as there was nothing else to look at. Everything about Louis was broken. His spine was curved sharply against his skin and his waist dipped in on both sides. As if it was sucking in on itself. His legs were thin and knees knobby. His shoulder bones pointed on the ends and his shoulder blades protruded outwards. One touch and Harry would die and Louis would break into a million of pieces. 

The officers footsteps were heavy and Harry wanted to grab Louis and hold him. Louis was shaking and cold and Harry gently placed Louis' hoodie on his shoulder. Louis grabbed it and slid it on without saying a thing or even looking at Harry. The hoodie fell past his waist so at least if they were caught he'd be covered. 

The shower stall was tiny but Louis and Harry managed to keep their distance on opposite corners. The only way they would be caught was if the officers flashlight shined under the shower at their feet. That's why Harry moved his eyes to watch the dark floor. He didn't have an escape plan. He just prayed. Prayed the officer would leave. Prayed Louis and him could just go back home and stay there forever. Home. Louis' house was Harry's home. At least that's what Harry thought. He needed a home. He wanted a home. And yes Louis' house was cursed but it was somewhere Harry felt cared about. Even if Louis didn't show it. He knew Louis cared. 

"Step out of the shower!" The voice boomed and Harry's body froze. Everything froze. His skin crawled and heart stopped beating. He has to fix this. As long as the officer doesn't touch Louis. But Louis looks so ill the officer will defiantly want to help. And what if he recognizes Harry? 

"Just- just a minute," Harry choked out and shoved Louis' pants at him. Louis slid them on and his eyes looked up at Harry. "I-just don't say anything okay? I'll get us out of here," Harry frowned as Louis was crying. Had he been crying this whole time? 

"Now!" 

"Coming," Harry whimpered and unlocked the door. He stepped out slowly and was blinded but the flashlight. 

"Your friend too," he said and Harry looked back at Louis. Louis was facing the corner again. His back to the officer and Harry. 

"Louis come on," Harry gulped and took a deep breath. Louis didn't move. "Louis," Harry huffed and saw Louis' shift his feet but nothing more. 

"Step out of the shower now!" The cop yelled and stepped forward. 

"Don't, he's just scared," Harry stepped in front of the officer and gulped. 

"You stay back," the officer snapped and Harry stepped back watching with panicked eyes. He could see Louis' back rising and falling. "I'll give you to the count of three."

Harry clenched his jaw and felt like throwing up. In three seconds either Louis was going to step out or the cop was going to die. 

The cop was standing at the door blocking Harry's view of Louis. He couldn't tell if he touched him or if Louis had turned around yet. It was driving him mad. 

"Stand by your friend," the cop growled and Louis appeared from behind the cop. His face even paler than before and his hands shaking. He touched him. Harry knew it. Louis stood beside Harry and his eyes were staring at the ground. Harry's were staring at the cop. He looked fine. "Now do you boys want to tell me what you're doing out here?" 

Harry glanced at Louis then at the cop. The cop seemed to be keeping a harsh glare on Louis. He did look ill and a tad suspicious. No, he looked very suspicious. Harry opened his mouth to speak but before he could the cop dropped to the ground. Dead. No pain. No nothing. He just died. Harry stared. He just stared. That man had a family and a life and probably a pet dog. He probably had plans for Christmas and for coffee the next morning with his co-workers. And now he's gone because- because he touched Louis. He just touched a boy. He was doing a job and Louis killed him. Harry felt angry and upset and everything just fell onto Louis' shoulders. This was Louis' fault. 

"You- you killed him," Harry choked out and stepped back. Louis stayed quiet and looked up at Harry with blurry blue eyes. "You just- you didn't even warn him."

"I'm going now," Louis frowned and looked around. 

"You just killed him Louis. Do you not feel bad at all?" Harry spoke up and he regretted it. He didn't- he was just so mad because this man had a life. It was the same as a car crash where no one sees it coming. No one asks for it. No one thinks about it before it's over. Except is wasn't a car crash. It was Louis. Louis was the semi-truck that didn't stop at the red light. 

"You told me not to suffer."

"I-you can't-this- this is different now that I've seen it."

"It's not."

Harry could tell Louis was holding back. Louis didn't want to care. He didn't want to believe he did this. Harry told him not to feed the thing inside of him and Louis was trying but he was failing miserably. It's been 8 years since Louis killed someone and he knew whatever was inside of Louis was having a feast right now. Louis was hurt. Louis was breaking even more. Louis was unfixable. 

"We need to go back," Harry mumbled and gulped. 

"You don't have to stay with me."

Harry's heart dropped and he watched Louis' eyes. Tears. Louis' eyes are pools that never stopped filling with water. 

"I want to. I can help you."

"No you can't."

"I can Louis. I can try and that- that's going to help you okay? Me trying. That's going to help you."

Louis looked up and stared at Harry. His mind trying to process what Harry said. Harry knew he didn't make much sense but he just felt connected to Louis. He wanted to help his only friend. Harry could run from his problem so why couldn't Louis? Why couldn't Louis be allowed to escape? 

Louis remained quiet and his eyes went back to the ground. They couldn't just stand out here forever though. There was a dead cop and his walkie talkie kept going off which meant something. Harry wasn't sure what it meant but sooner or later other cops were bound to show up. 

"Do you want me to stay? Yes or no?" Harry said sternly. He wanted to stay but he can't stay with someone who doesn't want him back. His father didn't want him and Harry didn't want his father so their was no use in staying. The only difference was that Harry wanted to Louis. 

"Yes."

"Then stop pushing me away. Please," Harry begged hoping the boy had some ounce of sympathy for him. Harry just needed someone-anyone-and Louis could be that friend. He could be that someone. For Christ sake, Louis already was that someone. 

"Okay," Louis sniffled. Harry nodded and had the urge to hug Louis but he's gotten a bit better at pushing the urges away. Even the slightest touch and Harry would be gone. That was the goal from the start of his runaway but now he wanted Louis' demon to be gone. That was the only thing that needed to be eliminated. He wanted Louis to know what a hug felt like, to know how a gentle touch could send shivers over your skin. He wanted Louis to feel.

They walked back to the house and Louis was quiet the whole entire time. Harry didn't expect him to speak though. He killed a innocent person on accident. You can't apologize for that. 

"Did you water the roses today?" Louis mumbled and Harry looked up. 

"Yes I will when the sun comes up," he answered softly. 

"When will they start growing?" 

"Soon," Harry responded and followed Louis to the living room. Louis took a seat on the small couch by the window sill but Harry remained standing. 

"What if they don't grow?" Louis frowned and it was hard to see because it was night and there was no lighting in the house. 

"Things always grow," Harry mumbled. 

"I don't grow," Louis poured. "I've been the same height for three years," he sighed.

"Yeah but people grow in other ways. I mean I saw your smile grow just the other day."

Louis looked up at Harry and blushed. Actually blushed. A color of slight pink on Louis' almost white skin. 

"You're blushing," Harry smirked as it wasn't pitch black and any color that wasn't grey scale obviously stood out on Louis. 

"M'not," Louis looked down with the corners of his mouth pulling into up into his cheeks. 

"You are," Harry grinned. "I can see it and I can see you smiling," he chuckled. 

"I'm not smiling," Louis mumbled and put his hand over his mouth. 

"You are to," Harry said and kneeled down in front of Louis so they were eye level. "Look at me, Louis," he whispered. 

"You're going to make me blush more," he shook his head and had both hands over his face now.

"I like when you blush it's cute," Harry whispered and wanted to tilt Louis' chin up with his hand but he couldn't even be gentle with Louis. 

"I'm not cute," he mumbled into is hands. 

"Yes you are. You're quite adorable," Harry whispered.

"You're lying."

"I'm not," Harry sighed and leaned back on his heels. "I think you're cute and that's that. What do you think of me hmm?" Harry tilted his head. 

Louis didn't answer and Harry bit his lip. Louis' hands gradually moved from his face and he looked at Harry shyly. 

"I think you're cute too," he whispered then covered his mouth to hide his smile. Harry felt butterflies and grinned widely. "And I- I like you," Louis blurted out ten covered his mouth again. 

"You like me?" Harry chuckled and watched Louis nod. "You like like me or just like me?" 

"The first one," he said and Harry swore he heard the boy giggle. 

"Well I like like you too," Harry whispered as if the world was going to steal their secret away. 

_________

"Louis! Louis come here quick!" Harry yelled and Louis came rushing in. Harry had bought Louis new clothes that weren't ripped or stained. They also spent one whole week cleaning and dusting. The house was still old but they tried to make it as new as possible. The electricity and water was resolved with candles and water bottles and trips to the river with soap. 

"What?" Louis raised his eyebrows and went to push his hair out of his face but Harry recently trimmed it- or he instructed Louis how to trim it. 

"Look it's growing," he pointed to one of the roses. "See the little green stem?"

Louis leaned down and smiled. "Are the others growing?" He beamed and scooted over to examine the other pots 

"Not yet but they will," Harry said and chewed on his lip. 

"Which one is it? The regular rose?" Louis asked. 

"Yeah," Harry nodded. "So in a few weeks it'll be bright red," he said and glanced at Louis. Louis' eyes were glued to the pot and a small smile was glued onto his face. But it was real. Each day passed and Louis became more real. More happy. More full of emotion. More compassion. 

"That's my favori-"

"Favorite color," Harry cut him off. "I know," he smiled and Louis looked up at him in awe. 

"Did you water them yet?"

"No it's your turn," Harry said and Louis nodded. He rushed into the kitchen and grabbed a water bottle before coming back in. "Not too much."

"I know, I know," Louis shooed Harry away and gently poured water into the soil. Gardening-even on a small scale-made Louis happy. A lot of things made Louis happy now. Gardening. Bathing. Cooking-whenever Harry could figure out how to make a fire. Reading. Drawing. Playing in the rain. Harry. 

"What do you want to do today?" Harry asked when Louis finished and put the water bottle down. 

"Um- do you still have markers?" Louis raised his eyebrows. Harry bought markers awhile ago because they used it to draw on the walls. It kept Louis happy and made the house prettier. 

"Of course I do," Harry said and nodded for Louis to follow him to the kitchen where he keeps them in a drawer. 

"Okay cause I want to draw something in my room on my wall," he said and took the pack of markers. 

"What do you want to draw?" Harry asked as they walked upstairs. They share Louis' room now. Harry managed to move Lottie's bed to Louis' room so the two beds are next to each other with space in between of course. 

"It's a surprise," Louis smirked and they walked into his room- or their room. 

"Well I want to help," Harry pouted and Louis took out the black marker. 

"Okay then draw the sun over there," Louis pointed to the upper corner and Harry groaned. "But that's it, then you have to go away," Louis said and narrowed his eyebrows as he concentrated on drawing. 

"I can't help at all?" Harry whined and pulled a desk chair over so he could actually reach the corner. He was tall but not that tall. 

"You can but- you can stay only cause I need you to."

Harry smiled and nodded. "That's what I thought."

"But you have to keep your eyes closed."

"What? Closed? How am I supposed to see what you're drawing then?"

"You aren't cause it's a surprise, except the sun part," Louis smiled up at Harry. 

"Alright fine I'll let you have your fun," Harry teased and drew the sun. He even added a pair of sunglasses just to be funny. 

"You gave it sunglasses?"

"Yes," Harry said and stepped down from the chair pushing it back to its original spot. 

"Why?"

"Because it looks cooler," he smirked and Louis rolled his eyes with a faint smile. 

"Okay now sit and close your eyes," Louis said and went back to drawing. Harry kept his eyes closed and only opened them once to peek but Louis saw. Which resulted in a T-shirt tied around Harry's head to cover his eyes. 

Harry wasn't sure how much time passed but then again he never knows. There's no clock anywhere in the house. He only knows Louis. Louis is the only structured thing he has. 

"Okay I'm done," Harry could hear louis' smile no matter how ridicules it may seem. Harry removed the t-shirt from Harry's eyes and Harry looked up at the once white wall. It was covered in color. The bottom was green grass, then two figures were drawn holding hands with hearts over their heads. One with curly hair and green eyes and the other with a fringe and blue eyes. 

"You're adorable," Harry whispered and glanced at Louis who was blushing. His skin isn't as white anymore. Harry wants to believe it's because he isn't suffering as much so maybe the spirit is leaving him alone. Or maybe Louis just doesn't think about things anymore. Just things about Harry. 

"Do you like it?"

"I love it," Harry said and kept his eyes on Louis'. In a normal world, Harry would kiss Louis. He's wanted to kiss Louis forever. It would be like in Beauty and the Beast and Harry would fix Louis. Make him feel better. Make his heart warm and skin tingle. 

"I-I messed up on your hair a bit," he said shyly clearly begging for Harry's acceptance and not wanting to appear unable. 

"No it's perfect. I love it Louis. I love it," he smiled again and walked up to it. "I wish my hair was that curly anyway," he teased and heard Louis giggle. His giggles are the cutest. 

"I like your hair how it is," Louis whispered and Harry looked up. 

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, it's pretty," Louis blushed and Harry knew he hit something. He wasn't sure what but he knew he hit something. 

"Lou?" Harry gulped. "I- I know it's only been a few weeks but I- I have a crush on you," Harry breathed out as he needed to get it off his chest. He needed Louis to know he was adored. And actually adored. Harry assumed Louis knew but he wanted Louis to know for sure how he felt. 

"Me too," Louis whispered and his hands were clasped together in front of him and his head was tilted down. 

"You have a crush on you?" Harry smirked.

"No," Louis smiled. "On you," he mumbled and Harry's heart fluttered. The boy whose never loved had a crush on him. 

"I would kiss you right now but..." Harry said thinking it would do no harm but he was wrong. Louis' head snapped up and Harry watched panic flood his face. Louis must have just pushed everything away. Every thought of killing people and not being able to touch and Harry just brought it all back. With 6 fucking words he broke Louis into a million pieces again. "Lou..."

"I-you need to leave."

"What?" Harry frowned. "We've been fine for weeks."

"No, no, no," Louis shook his head violently and Harry swore he was close to snapping his neck off. "I can't risk it anymore. You need to leave and never come back."

"I can't just leave you here."

"Well I can't go anywhere else!" Louis yelled and Harry frowned as Louis has never gotten that frustrated. That mad. He usually runs. Why hasn't Louis run away?

"We can figure it out, Louis, please it's been working."

"Nothing's been working!" Louis yelled and he was crying now. "I still kill everything! Everything dies because of me! You aren't helping! You're just- you're just-"

"I'm just what?" Harry snapped as Harry has done nothing but help. How could Louis even say he hasn't? Louis hasn't felt sad or anything. He smiles now for Christ sake. 

"You're just- you're making it harder," Louis mumbled and let his head fall. 

"Harder?" Harry continued to raise is voice. "How- I've literally done everything for you Louis! I've made you smile and laugh and you eat now! You don't look like death for once!"

Louis looked up and his eyes filled with tears. "I am death. I told you that..." His head hung low. 

"Well not to me. You're no where close to death. If anything you're light because you've shown me that people can help. You've helped me Louis. I feel comfortable with you and I know you wouldn't hurt me. You'd never hurt me, I- why can't you just see that? We're making progress."

"I can't be fixed," Louis whimpered. "I'm only alive because I can't kill my self. I can't even run away. I can't do anything for myself. I smile because I know it makes you happy but I'm just a black hole. There's no light. No happiness-"

"I don't make you happy?" Harry frowned feeling the tip of a knife poke into his heart.

"I-you keep me distracted."

There's goes the knife. Harry glared at Louis and shook his head. Everything has been a waste then. Louis has been faking. It's a spirit, Harry knows it can't stay in Louis forever. But if it does then Louis still has the burden of murder on his shoulders. 

"Then what do I need to do?"

"Leave," Louis mumbled and wiped at his eyes with his sleeves that covered his hands. 

"I'm not- I'm not leaving until I help you," Harry made that promise and he intends to keep it. 

"I couldn't- I don't want you to-" Louis stuttered at a loss for words. Or at a loss of phrasing the words he had in mind. 

"Tell me," Harry frowned. "I want to fix you.

"You'd have to kill me...."

Harry's wounded heart fell out of his chest and onto the floor. Kill him? He can't. He won't. He won't ever kill Louis. 

"I'm not doing that."

"I know but that's the only way I can be fixed."

"It can't be," Harry bit hit lip trying to think. 

"Harry," Louis looked up and the two boys met eyes. "Even if you fix me- I want to die. You haven't done- you haven't watched your family die before your very eyes. They dropped like flies Harry and no one could even save them," Louis choked out then turned around and ran. 

Harry stayed put and watched as Louis disappeared upstairs. He can't kill Louis. He just can't. Even if it was Louis' last wish on Earth, Harry wouldn't do it. 

Harry decided to give Louis space. This was his first major break down in weeks and Harry caused it. It made Harry sick knowing Louis was hopeless. But he couldn't blame Louis for that. None of this was Louis' fault. 

The rest of the day was silent. Louis never made an appearance and Harry was too hurt to find him. With his prior knowledge, Louis was either in his-their- room or one of his family members room. Usually he'd be in the basement under the steps but that would mean coming downstairs and seeing Harry. Louis obviously didn't want to do that. The sun was hidden away now and Harry had a few candles going in the living room. The roses were all doing well, little small green stems poking through the soil. Harry was surprised they managed to even grow inside such a dusty, lack of air, and cold environment. There was no heating and it was the end of November. Thankfully, it hasn't snowed but the temperatures still dropped at night. He was currently cuddled up under about three blankets he had got from the market. Well, Mrs. Genvert actually got them for him because she works there non-stop and was the only person who picked up on Harry's frequent visits.

She knew everything. Well not about Louis' power? Condition? Harry didn't know what to call it. She just knew that Harry and Louis lived alone together in an abandoned house. She was sweet and promised not to call the police as she knew Harry's father. He was thankful for her. Extremely thankful. If he came by at closing hours she would sneak him left over goods from the bakery and deli. Louis liked cupcakes the best. The ones with blue icing because he would laugh when Harry's mouth stained blue. Louis' laugh was incredible. It was everything Harry had hoped it to be. It was loud and at points it would squeak making Louis cover his mouth. 

Even if he won't admit it, Harry knew Louis was getting better. Mentally and physically. His skin didn't suction to his bones as much and his skin wasn't as white, more flesh like and human. The bags under his eyes were gone completely as Harry and him always make sure to get rest. Harry makes sure Louis falls asleep first though. He sleeps with the blanket pulled up to his chin and his body curled into a ball. Harry's had dreams of just cuddling him. His body pressed against Louis' small one and letting the boy curl against him. Hold onto his shirt or maybe even wrap his legs around him. Louis probably doesn't even know what another person skin feels like. Harry wanted to know what Louis' felt like. He wanted to know if Louis was ticklish, if he got shy when a hand would cup his cheek, if he fidgeted at ghostly finger tip skims of the arm, if he buried his head into people's necks during hugs. He needed to know if that was what Louis wanted. If he just needed to be touched. Held. Caressed. Kissed. 

"Lou?" Harry gulped and slowly pushed the door open. His hands sweating and heart ripping into pieces. Louis was right where he assumed he was. Curled up in a ball under the covers, except in Harry's bed this time. Harry sighed and gently walked over setting the object down on the floor so Louis couldn't see it. "Louis?" Harry tried again and his voice broke. 

"Stop crying," Louis sniffled and two blue eyes appeared from under the covers. They were red and puffy but still so blue, so hurt. 

"I-I know how to fix you..." 

"I said there's only one way and you would never do it," Louis choked out and wiped his eyes with the edge of the blanket. 

"No there's, there's another-"

"Stop it," Louis frowned as Harry got too close. "Stop it Harry," Louis frowned and rolled out of bed landing on the floor. Day one all over again. He stood up and glared at Harry. 

Harry pursed his lips and felt about ready to throw up. His stomach was one huge knot. His hands trembling. Everything trembling. 

"Louis-"

"Stop saying my name like that," Louis frowned and Harry realized he was scaring him. He was scaring himself. 

"Just- come here," Harry whispered and motioned to where he was standing. "I-I know how to fix you trust me..."

Louis stayed quiet and his eyes searched Harry's. He trusted him. Harry watched in pain as Louis slowly walked over and stood about a foot away. He was so tiny and so small. His eyes were so blue but missing something. Missing emotion. Missing happiness. His skin was tan but somehow grey, but somehow it looked so soft. And his lips were so pink from Louis crying earlier. And his nose was the cutest nose Harry had ever seen. It was like a button but in a Louis kind of way. And his eyelashes were long and his cheekbones were so prominent Harry could worship them forever. He could worship Louis forever. 

"Louis," Harry said again and the biggest lump in his throat was blocking him from talking. A steady stream of tears now rolling down his cheeks. "Can I kiss you?" He choked out and took deep breaths to keep himself from sobbing. 

Louis stared at Harry like he had six heads. "You know you can't do that," Louis whimpered and seeing Harry cry made Louis cry. 

"But do you want to be kissed?" Harry gulped and licked his lips. For some reason his mouth tasted like metal and his whole body was frozen. 

Louis looked down at his fingers and then his eyes caught what was beside Harry's feet. Harry just kept his eyes ahead and watched Louis. He didn't want to look down. He didn't need to until the time was right.

"Harry..." Louis whispered and looked up. "I- I- "

"Just kiss me," Harry choked out and reached forward grabbing Louis' face and yanking him into him. Their lips collided and Louis' arms flew around Harry's body. Harry gripped onto Louis' shirt then put his hands under it feeling Louis' skin. His warm skin. He felt Louis' hands do the same to him. Their lips moving together and tears mixing in. Everything moved quickly but Harry was trying to let Louis have it all. "Here," Harry grumbled out quickly against Louis' lips and pulled his shirt off. Louis whimpered and moved his hands to feel along Harry's chest. To feel his skin. To feel another person's touch. Harry unzipped Louis' hoodie and slid his hands into Louis' shirt again. His skin was so soft and he could feel the small indents of the scars but he didn't care. He was touching Louis. He was kissing Louis. 

"I-you- I love you," Harry managed out as he knew it was too soon. Way too soon but it was over. His life was over and he had never told that to anyone. He wanted Louis to be that person. To know that someone could love him. 

"I love you too," Louis cried and Harry stepped back to reach down. Louis whimpered and squeezed his eyes shut. Not the heart. He can't hurt Louis' heart after he just mended it. Louis' breathing was heavy and Harry had to close his eyes. He had to do this. He couldn't leave Louis alone like this. In this state of never dying. Of the remorse and regret. "Thank you," Louis whimpered and Harry's hand shook. Harry fixed him. After years of nothing, Harry gave Louis everything. 

Harry opened his eyes slowly and saw Louis just standing there. His arms to his sides and head slightly tilted back. His eyes were closed and he his lips were slightly open. Tear stains down his cheeks. Louis wanted to die now, he was ready. Harry's heart snapped into a million pieces and he lunged his arm forward, stabbing Louis in the chest right about where his lungs would be. Louis let out a whimper and his eyes flew open in pain. Harry's hand yanked the knife out and watched Louis drop to his knees. 

Harry whimpered and threw the knife across the room falling to his knees. "Forever okay?" He grabbed Louis and pulled him into a hug. Louis' face buried in Harry's neck as Harry didn't know when but it would be soon. He would be gone. It may take Louis longer though. 

"Forever," Louis mumbled into Harry's skin and Harry pulled away but only to lay on his side and Louis followed. Harry didn't even say anything else. He just laid their staring into Louis' eyes and Louis staring back. "You can close your eyes now," Louis whispered and Harry nodded. He leaned forward and gave Louis one last kiss. Louis didn't pull away when Harry stopped kissing. When Harry stopped breathing. He just kissed him back and held on tight feeling his breathing get more shallow. His body getting weak. He didn't even feel the pain where Harry stabbed him. Everything else hurt to much. 

"Forever," Louis whispered again and for the last time he gave a soft smile to Harry and slowly let his eyes close shut.


End file.
